it's not a nude party but there's no rules against taking your pants off too

[flightsuit]

in which everyone is required to take their damn shirt off because reasons that's really all there is to this party so just take it off ladays and gents TOPLESS PARTY

Comments

he exists to make people squirm

[ingoodhans]

[ Crossing your arms only shows off your ripped biceps, Kristoff. That's just unfair. ]

You're lucky, man. I have to work out like, every day to keep in shape.

[ It's so hard being attractive... ]

Do you run? I mean, you must at least jog, right?

he does a good job.

[malodorous]

[ Wow, this guy is really into this stuff. Um... ]

I guess? I mean... Yes. In the evening. If I don't have work or whatever.

it's a skill

[ingoodhans]

We should run together sometime. Right after sunset is a great time, since it's still light out and cooling down.

[ Is he coming on to you or does he really like exercising this much. We can't say. I knew a guy like this once... ]

[malodorous]

[ Kristoff can't tell and it's really uncomfortable. ]

Um. Who are you again?

[ingoodhans]

Oh! We haven't been introduced.

[ Embarrassing. Hans is obviously flustered by his faux pas. Is he really, though...? Well maybe a little. He extends his hand, smiling. ]

Sorry about that, I'm Hans. Anna's friend.

[malodorous]

Hans. Right. Hi. [ And Kristoff can manage to un-cross his arms to shake hands. He's not sure how to label himself, so far as why he's here goes, or if he even has to.

... Yeah. He'll just leave it off. He's not anybody's friend, really. ]

I'm Kristoff.

[ingoodhans]

Nice to meet you, Kristoff.

[ Hans smiles, easy and natural and so damn cheery. ]

So how 'bout that run, huh? You seem like the outdoorsy type-- personally, I prefer the waterfront. The breeze is awesome.

[malodorous]

[ Wow, and now... How to get out of this? ]

Well, it's not really a company thing for me, you know? It's usually... Uh. I like it quiet. It's a relaxation thing.

[ingoodhans]

Ah. [ Hans draws back. ]

I see. So you're... not in it for the exercise, are you?

[ Is he judging you? Little bit. ]

Sure I couldn't convince you? There's nothing quite like the burn of a good run.

[malodorous]

[ God, what is that judgement face? Kristoff hates people so much. Why is everybody an asshole? Everybody. ]

Well, yeah. I get that. I like 'the burn' as much as the next guy, it's just... not a team thing, you know?

[ingoodhans]

....I think I get it.

[ He does get it. But that's like, no fun at all. ]

You don't think I could keep up with your pace, do you? I know I'm not as tall as you, so my strides aren't as long, but...

[ There is no escape. ]

[malodorous]

[ Oh my god. Oh my god. WHY???? Internal screaming. Just-- God. Why does this have to be a big deal? Why did he even come here? This sucks. Point blank.

Like, he doesn't even know what to say for a good moment, just-- Ugh. ]

Are you serious, man?

[ Because he can't be. ]

[ingoodhans]

[ Not missing a beat here. He's so serious. ]

...I mean, I'm sure if it's my pace that's too fast, I could slow down for you! Just tell me what you need, really.

[ Really, he's just trying to be nice. Really. ]

[malodorous]

[ This is exactly why he never goes to parties. This guy is the reason. And not that he never gets invited, but ANYWAY... ]

I need you to drop it. I already said I'm not interested, didn't I?

[ There. Blunt. Take the hint and run with it, dude. Just don't run with it with Kristoff. ]